Alarm bells from progress - children are forgetting how to play. No, they can play computer games and watch TV too. This is not difficult to learn by watching your parents.

You also engage in early development with them so as not to miss anything. Maybe this game is not needed at all?

Just playing, baby

• Gets smarter. Logic develops. Just putting the pyramid together costs a lot! The child learns to generalize, plan, control, develops attention, memory and imagination.
• Growing up. In the game, the child heals, teaches, builds. Does what is not yet available to him real life. And he really wants to become an adult.
• He's getting better. With a partner, you can learn to take the position of another person and overcome your egocentrism. Interaction in the game encourages the development of mutual assistance, patience and honesty.
• While playing, the child learns to obey the rules, as well as to create these rules, the will develops little man. Additionally, social maturity honed in a fun way eases the path to school success. A preschooler can gain the necessary experience through plot-based role-playing game.

In a year and two, five and three different games are needed

At the age of about 1 year, the baby loves to repeat movements: waving a rattle, pushing the same object, knocking one thing against another, clapping something. These are already the first steps towards the game. Only those toys that an adult has demonstrated and shown are valuable. What to do with them. They also need to be changed frequently. The most important thing in playing before one year is that the child tries to get an adult’s assessment of his actions. He watches whether you pay attention, whether you are happy, whether you approve of his actions.

Underwater rocks. If we don't play properly - the child sucks his finger or rocks - development is delayed.

There are too many items. The child simply sorts through objects without having time to play with any particular toy.

From 1 year to 3 years.

The baby uses objects for their intended purpose. Now their set is becoming more diverse: pyramids, frames, inserts, nesting dolls, cars, cubes, musical instruments, dishes - everything will be useful.

Closer to the age of three, a child begins to be interested in cartoons, which means that after watching his favorite cartoon, he can be made to play games with characters from this cartoon. During this age period, games with Peppa Pig are perfect, which will be both fun and educational.

But children under 2 years old learn about the world only with your help. After all, a child masters actions only by watching you. First, the baby understands why the item is needed. Got it, waiting for praise. Then he hones the skill. Then he transfers the action to another object. For example, he combs himself first. Then mom, then a doll, then a bear.

If a comb becomes a substitute object, this is already a leap in intellectual development. A chain of actions will appear later. The doll is fed, bathed, and put to bed. The dump truck is loaded, unloaded, and placed in the garage. A logical chain of actions in the game appears in children close to two years old. All of the above are considered object-tools. Top class such a game, start a conversation with the toy and respond on its behalf.

Underwater rocks. The child is playing around - i.e. The game doesn't even have a hint of a plot. The child has no desire to receive evaluation of his actions from adults.

From 3 to 7 years.

The kingdom of the role-playing game. It reaches its peak at 5-7 years of age.

It becomes especially interesting to play “mother and daughter”, “father and mother”. Fortunately, an example in this case is always nearby. If your girl wants to try herself as a mother, you can not only buy her a doll, but also let her play baby care. Such games will be much more interactive and interesting than ordinary dolls.

Make sure your child sees what people in different professions do. This is material for changing roles, and therefore for development.

Underwater rocks. The child plays alone in the company of children, continues to play without a plot or role, remains in an observer's position, and exclusively plots from films and cartoons are played.

Knowing about the pitfalls, a parent will be able to guide his child past them. And mothers and fathers will be able to teach their children any skills, teach them to follow the rules, and even correct their character. Something as seemingly insignificant as playing with children will help you gain real authority. Most importantly, you can have a lot of fun doing it.

Children's play has enormous developmental value. The more a child plays, the higher his ability to learn, open up, grow internally and enjoy the world. What is the meaning of children's play, can we understand and support it?

The meaning of games

Games are all around us; a game is not just porridge in a plastic bucket, a game is politics and flirting, subcultural traditions and religious rituals, theatrical performances and behavior in business negotiations, football matches and scientific discoveries. Adults, children and even animals play. A dog running after a ball, dolphins jumping out of the water, bears in frivolous sparring - all demonstrate playful behavior.

But only in human civilization does the game have such universal significance, and maybe that’s why bears and dolphins still don’t build stadiums.

In the 19th century, it was believed that play is what distinguishes humans from other creatures. Modern ethologists know that play behavior is extremely important for animals as well.

For example, playing mountain goats, jumping through the mountains, harm themselves, so they risk falling from a height. However, researchers have found that these seemingly stupid goats that jump along dangerous serpentine roads end up becoming smarter than their comrades who are deprived of this opportunity. Playing goats adapt to life more successfully: they leave more healthy offspring and find better food for themselves.

Psychiatrist and clinical researcher Stuart Brown once spoke about studies conducted on mice. One group of rodents was deprived of the opportunity to play, while the other developed normally. After the mice were frightened by the smell of a cat, the scientists observed their reactions. At first, both groups huddled in a corner, but then the animals that early years in games, we went to carefully explore the territory and sniff corners. The other group, which included non-playful mice, remained sitting in the corner.

The conclusion of scientists is that gaming behavior is a vital necessity; it helps to adapt to any conditions.

Game and brain

While your child is running around and, in grandpa's opinion, meaninglessly honking like a train, his brain is physically changing. No cubes with letters can give the effect that a “locomotive with a whistle” has on the human neurosystem. Play stimulates cell growth in the amygdala, the area responsible for controlling emotions. (By the way, her disorders are believed to be related to autism and anxiety states.) The game affects the dorsolateral zone of the cerebral cortex, and it is responsible for decision making and information distribution.

Neuroscientists are willing to swear that the Cossack robbers you raced in as a child had a significant impact on your cognitive abilities. Maybe even more than third grade arithmetic lessons.

In addition, the game allows you to test yourself, try on new experiences, develop self-control, and experience a state of flow - a special state of concentration that gives a lot of energy.

What makes the game different

The teacher comes to the children and says: “Let’s play!” And the children chorused: “Nope, we don’t want to!” They don’t want to, because they know: now the teacher will smile joyfully, jump joyfully, and then try to shove something unnecessary into them. (Maybe it’s necessary, but it’s unlikely – since it’s being forced into it under the guise of a game).

This game has the following features:

Obvious aimlessness, process for the sake of process. When an adult does a wheel several times out of joy, not to show what the letter X looks like from the side.

Voluntariness. If one of the participants forces himself to pretend to eat sand, this is no longer a game, but torture.

Inherent appeal. The game is attractive, addictive, looks intriguing, and you don’t mind sacrificing wallpaper for it.

Freedom from time. I just sat down to play after breakfast, and for some reason it got dark outside.

Weakening of self-awareness. You get excited and show off a pregnant boa constrictor, completely forgetting that pregnant boa constrictors are not your forte.

Potential for improvisation. Oh no not this! The pregnant boa constrictor began to sing an aria.

The desire to continue. Despite the neighbors knocking on the radiator.

If our activities do not correspond to these points, we need to ask ourselves the question, what are we actually doing here?

Game by age

The division by age is quite arbitrary and does not mean that only one way to play at 2 or 3 years old. For example, manipulative play begins during embryonic development (yes, they have very fascinating things like the umbilical cord and amniotic sac) and continues until the end of life, while the umbilical cord is slowly replaced by a smartphone, and then a machine that measures blood pressure.

1. Manipulative play (from 3–4 months of embryonic development)

For a child under one and a half years old, this is the most important activity - throw, roll, hide, find, change shape, rustle, ring, scatter. Experiments with flying buntings can sometimes upset adults, but they should certainly be present in a child’s life. If a person throws dishes, you need to let him pounce, satiate his interest. And if you are not ready to shout “For good luck!” every time, buy plates that are not so fragile.

2. Symbolic game (from 1.5–1.8 g)

This type of play begins when the child can give an object new functions: a piece of bread becomes a crown, a stick becomes a doll, a chair becomes a car.

Symbolic thinking underlies imagination and a sense of humor. So when a steam locomotive made of sausages is coming towards you, send another locomotive made of forks to cross it. This is the creation of a so-called imaginary situation in which the imagination works at full capacity.

3. Role play (from 2–3 years old)

Here it is no longer an object, but a child trying on images: practicing social roles, turns into a kitten or a dinosaur. By what roles the baby chooses for himself, you can find out what his strengths and weaknesses are. For example, an anxious child will choose an aggressive role: I grab a grenade launcher because I’m not sure of the situation around me and I need to scare everyone in advance.

Literature describes cases when sisters in life suggest to each other: “Let’s play that we are sisters!” What's the trick here: while playing, they try to realize their ideal ideas about sisters. If in life you can pull your sister’s ear, then in the game you walk by the arms and stroke each other’s braids. It will be easy for parents to embody the ideal model of mother and baby (“Let’s play like you’re my mother!”) with their child, rock him in their arms and kiss him on the top of the head.

Role play works well for learning new situations: if the family is about to travel, move or potty train, then before these events you should play travel, move or potty training several times. The information will be appropriated by the child, and he will be able to digest it in everyday life.

Role-playing will accompany us all our lives, and the better we play it as a child, the better we will be able to pretend to be an awake employee at a meeting.

4. Role-playing game (from 3–4 years old)

At this stage, the player not only has a role, something is still happening to him all the time: this is not just a pirate who waves a saber, this is a pirate who boarded a ship, sailed into the sea, where he was attacked by sharks, and also the ship's mast broke... The plot-role-playing game is emotionally lived out, in it it is very important to find your own style of behavior and develop the outline of the events. Modern children are usually very bad at playing role-playing games, because at 3-4 years old we suddenly start teaching them, introducing a busy lesson schedule and showing them the letters. If going to the store in the game and putting dolls to sleep is not a problem for anyone, then a rare child can develop a story about losing money in a supermarket.

Here we can advise you to play yourself, take them to places where they know how and love to play, read literature, go to the theater with your family...

5. Directing (from 4–5 years old)

This is aerobatics, such a game can last a very long time - months, it has many plots, and it takes different shapes. Make up different stories every day lost World, playing Robin Hood with a tree house all summer with friends, creating a series of comics about a traveling circus - these are all types of director's games.

A child who knows how to create and support such a game not only develops thinking and speech, but also gains a leadership position among peers who have not yet learned to play military dictatorship African tribe"Tubma."

Games that scare parents

Children's games associated with sex and death cause the most anxiety among adults.

A doctor who is shown parts of the body, “mom and dad” hugging – all this makes parents nervous, and completely in vain. Children's interest in heterogeneity, in the body, in relationships is normal. Sex exists in our lives, and the child will acquire knowledge about it in any case. It is important to decide whether we take on this parental function - to explain to children about sex, or whether we push it away from ourselves in the hope that the best way to tell the child about it is in a random video on the Internet. The fact that a child has started playing games with sexual overtones only means one thing – it’s time to talk to him about it. And on the contrary, the books “How the Stork Brought Me Brought Me” hidden behind the seven mezzanines will only fuel the taboo topic interest.

Games of illness, death and funerals are also ways to comprehend disturbing information. If we tensely hide the fact that the great-grandfather did not go on a business trip at all, then the child is more frightened by our silence than the truth would be. The only thing worth thinking about is how exactly to do this.

But what is not a game and should alert parents is bullying and computer games. Bullying (bullying) is not just teasing, it is teasing that exceeds the child’s strength, a situation from which he cannot escape. at will go out. The teasers themselves are useful things. It is human nature to tease those around us, our beloved husband, best friend, and in children, verbal aggression is generally a step forward compared to physical aggression. A person who is clever in teasing can avoid being insulted on the playground even without fists. Unlike the situation of bullying, when simply playing teasing, children feel where the line is that should not be crossed, so as not to hurt the other.

A computer game is not a game, because while the child is sitting in front of the screen, nothing happens to him, he does not learn new things about himself, and does not test the limits of his capabilities. He doesn't change internally at all.

Separate line: board games

Board games are good because they are usually where the interests of children and parents converge; they are the easiest for the whole family to sincerely get involved in. Game enthusiasm is contagious.

If at the age of 2 we support and animate the most basic games, then by the age of five or six we will have a person who can compete in complex strategic games, like “Colonizers.”

An amazing fact: a child has to sit through 35 minutes of a lesson in the first grade, while for two hours in the same uncomfortable position at the table in front board game he conducts it easily and at the same time with concentration. This is a tremendous training in self-control and self-discipline. A person voluntarily sits down to play a game, accepts its rules and, of his own free will, decides difficult questions, experiencing not only joy, but also grief and annoyance.

Pitfalls of the game

We will talk about subtle points that need to be remembered during the game so that it brings joy to all participants.

1. Losing and winning

Here parents often spoil the whole raspberry, either playing along or, conversely, not allowing the child to win. You can’t give in, there must be drive in the game, but you can set special rules and give a head start. “You need to eat three frogs, but I need six.” From the age of 4–5, it is important for a child to learn how to lose, because then peers will not give in or sprinkle ashes on their heads when something goes wrong. Losing is also a valuable experience. And it is especially easy to worry if the parent also shows his reaction: he is sincerely upset when he loses, or he is heartily happy when he scores points.

2. Competitive moment

Parents often use this moment for manipulation: “Come on, who will tie his shoelaces and wash the dishes faster?!” Psychologists do not recommend fueling your competitiveness once again; life already has enough competition and tension.

3. Too many toys

A common problem that is quite difficult for parents to understand. Toys that occupy three closets are toys that a child cannot control. It was as if they had defeated him. But a child should be the ruler of his domain. But his gaming energy is not enough to conquer Siberia and Far East. The problem is easily solved by reducing the rows of robots and tractors.

4. Hidden goals

If, under the guise of playing sailors, you are trying to teach your daughter Morse code, there is nothing wrong with that, but you should honestly admit to yourself that you are not playing now, but studying. It’s easy to deceive children with the game, but the main thing is not to deceive yourself: we are not playing snake, but putting tights on a person without hysterics.

5. Lack of motivation from one of the players

A mother who, yawning, asks if pale-faced people can wash dishes during a battle is a very sad sight. A mother who said that playing is very cool and interesting, and then runs away from the dungeon to answer the phone, is obviously disingenuous. If swinging on vines is so unbearable for you, call one of your friends who can teach your children to play poker and will be sincere and passionate about it.

How to bring gaming back into your life

The secret is that adults playing on their own motivate a child much more than a mother who is forced to place one cube on top of another.

So when you stop biting yourself for failures in the game with Pretty Pony, think about what is your personal game? Perhaps you like to pounce on a child and tickle him, jump over cracks in the asphalt on one leg, sing camp songs, come up with rhymes or send boats down the river - it doesn’t matter what you play.

You just need to share your playful state with the child, convey to him this feeling of joy and flight. Once he realizes how great it is, he will have a chance to find his own game.

The game can be hidden in the little things, be frivolous, allow yourself to fool around, rustle dry leaves and read signs with a stupid accent, cook soup as if you were making a witch's potion, but give yourself the right to make mistakes, look and don't be afraid!

And if you are not in the mood, allow yourself not to play. You can always invite people playing to visit, or simply welcome children's play from the outside.

Rules family game:

* Don't play if you don't want to.

* Negotiate.

* Be yourself.

* Don't give in.

* Don't destroy the game unnecessarily.

* Do not mock or mock.

* Don't show power.

* Think about other players.

Be sure to play with your little ones today!

We will be happy to post your articles and materials with attribution.
Send information by email

expert opinion

Galina Itskovich psychotherapist

“The game helps us, adults, understand children and develop a common language with them”

Licensed clinical psychotherapist, lives and works in New York City, specializing in family and children's issues. For 10 years she worked as a psychotherapist and supervisor in clinics of the Jewish Council for Family and Children. She founded the multidisciplinary therapeutic early intervention program “KidsPower” and directed it until 2012. She was a speaker at the “Every Child Deserves a Family” forum, held in Moscow in 2013. Teaches the DIR/Floortime technique to specialists from different countries working with children with behavioral disorders and autism spectrum disorders.

Psychologies:

How important is play for children?

Galina Itskovich:

Play is not just important - it is necessary for the development of a child. Even though some games may seem primitive or monotonous, they deliver important function. For a child, any game is the same productive activity as work for an adult. The result of work for an adult is a product, something that he has produced. For a child, the product of play efforts is a new concept (for example, “parts combine into a whole,” cause-and-effect relationship, and so on). In fact, the game is the first job little man. So it’s worth treating a playing child like a scientist asking an important question. scientific experiment, or a designer who builds a device according to drawings. While playing, children explore the world. While playing, they master a style of behavior that will later become their strategy and tactics in communicating with other people. Play for a child is a way of interacting with the world.

Do children know how to play from birth or do they need to be taught this?

G.I.:

The invitation to the first joint game usually comes from an adult who sets some task for the child. For example, smile in response to a smile. To do this, the child must learn to change his facial expression, tense some muscles and relax others. This is serious work for him. And an adult pronouncing “agu”, in addition to this, invites the child to master the art of imitation. In this very first game of all time, a child masters the complex interaction between the facial muscles and vocal cords: to respond to “aha”, he must either round his mouth, imitating a visual image, or play a sound in response to a sound he heard, or simply stretch your lips into a smile. Then the game gets more difficult. The first interactive game is followed by “palms”, then, at 3-4 months, other games that use not only an open palm, but also fingers, like “magpie-crow”. By 5-6 months, the game of peek-a-boo appears - it helps the child, who has recently discovered that objects and people continue to exist even after they disappear from his field of vision, to “consolidate the material.”

Usually the child has some favorite toy, such as a bear or a hare. What is its meaning?

G.I.:

By 9 months, the baby begins to develop an internal image of his mother and the first anxiety arises when his mother leaves. And the child learns to cope with it with the help of soft toys. They perform the function of a transitional object - which, although not a mother, still has the magical gift of comfort in the eyes of the baby. A child carries a stuffed animal with him everywhere - this is how he begins to build his own world. This is his first step towards independence.

So what's the next step?

G.I.:

A qualitative change occurs at the end of the first year. The child begins to walk. At approximately 12 months, the game of peek-a-boo is transformed into another game of comparable degree. thrills, - hide and seek. Now the child shows much more initiative. His capabilities are expanding, and he is ready to invent new and new versions of the game, playing out various scenarios of mysterious disappearance and emergence. Learning to play independently is the next important step in emotional development.

Often, when talking about children's play, they mean role-playing games: to the store, to the hairdresser, to daughters and mothers. At what age do children start playing with them and why are they needed?

G.I.:

The period of role-playing games is 2.5-4.5 years, when the child’s verbal repertoire expands. At the same time, he plays symbolic games (this is the famous children's “And this will be ...”), which turn a bush into a house, a chair into a train, and in general anything into anything. At this time, the child not only perceives symbols - he begins to independently operate with them. At first he simply imitates adults, then gradually complicates the game scenario and adds situations that he comes up with. Role-playing allows the child to push limits own capabilities(for example, he can try on the role of an adult professional or an older family member), perform a thought experiment and return to the safety of his room. Thus, at a new stage of development, the child repeats that first, timid separation from the mother, which marks the beginning of individuality. He builds his own symbolic world.

Why is this symbolic world so important for children?

G.I.:

In this world, a child can safely play out difficult situations (for example, “they forgot me,” “I got lost”), search various ways their permissions. He can also play out scenes that he observed in life and which cause him anxiety. Play at this age often consists of a theme with variations. It repeats the general scenario - but it can develop in different ways: “I got lost, but my grandmother found me”, “I got lost and began to live alone”). This is how the child develops his own approach to solving life problems. The child rehearses familiar and imaginary situations during the game, as if a musician were rehearsing before a concert.

What should an adult do in such a game?

G.I.:

The role of an adult is to support the child in the game and encourage him. This helps the child understand that his attempts to comprehend the situation, his opinion, are valuable and deserve respect. But an adult should not insist on his own decision, even if it seems to him that he “knows what is right.” Because children react to this with protest, and it can end in refusal to play together, loss of interest in the game, and even hysteria. In some cases, children who seem to have accepted the conditions of the adult player react to his intervention with anxiety and a feeling of helplessness.

Then maybe it’s better for adults to completely refuse to participate in games and not interfere?

G.I.:

If an adult - parent or teacher - avoids playful communication or finds it unpleasant, then the child may feel tension or bewilderment and may conclude that the area of ​​feelings is a forbidden or dangerous zone. The child may also feel lonely or feel unable to adequately express their emotions, which ultimately leads to lower self-esteem. In addition, by refusing to play together, we leave children very few opportunities to form with us meaningful connections. Whereas play helps us, adults, understand our children and develop a common language with them. The rhythm and pace of joint play can vary depending on the individual characteristics of the child - one processes information faster, another needs Extra time. It is important for adults to understand the child's needs.

Play is the most important part of a child’s life, and parents are the most important people for him. It would seem that it is the parents who should teach the child to play and participate in children's fun with full dedication. But why does playing with a child become a difficult and even overwhelming burden for many adults? Mothers of the youngest complain: “I’m bored of rolling cars with him, putting rings on a pyramid a hundred times, assembling towers from cubes. But it’s necessary!” Children grow up, master active and role-playing games, but mothers remain dissatisfied: they have already played their role in their daughters and mothers in childhood, and hide-and-seek is not the most interesting activity for an adult. And here the question arises: is it necessary to play with a child in principle? Does he really need our help, since the game is his territory? Or should parents still step over internal barriers and learn to play with their child? Let's try to figure it out.

Why is it so difficult for us to play with children?

Play is a special activity of a child. In the game he does not pursue any goal, but simply has fun. Only by playing does a child become independent, in charge, the creator of the situation - because outside of play he always occupies a subordinate position, simply due to his age. No wonder children love to play so much!

What about us, adults? We have long learned to manipulate objects, and putting a ring on a pyramid, naturally, no longer seems to us an important achievement. We don't need to repeat the same action over and over again, and that's okay. It would be strange if it were otherwise! As for older children, the ability to get used to role-playing for most of us (ordinary parents, not actors) fades with age, because an adult has other tasks. We love smart, desktop and sport games, which have some final goal, but the kids have not yet grown up to them, they are interested in trivial, in our opinion, entertainment. And they repeat themselves day after day...

It turns out to be an extremely strange picture. A child wants to play all day long, but adults, by and large, do not need play. However, parents love their children very much and try to give them everything they need. They play even when they don’t want to, because they HAVE TO, or they play occasionally, but are tormented by a feeling of guilt (“I don’t play enough!”). An annoying situation, isn't it? Coupled with a general feeling of constant responsibility for the baby, doubts about oneself as a good mother lead to various consequences: buying a huge number of toys, the mother’s excessive enthusiasm for early development, irritation and fatigue from the child...

Should parents play with their child?

No one will deny that playing is very useful for a child. Playing, kids different ages develop intellectually, learn to manipulate objects, make discoveries, learn to act like adults, lose life situations and solve current emotional problems. However, for a child, play is a natural element, while for an adult it is unnatural! That’s why it’s so difficult for us, and hence the question in the title: should parents play with their children?

Of course, the word “should” sounds a little inappropriate. The emotional aspects of life cannot be fit into the framework of obligations. However, the question remains: how much does the child need parental intervention and help in organizing the game?

Several points need to be said here.

1. A child does not need an animator, he needs communication, inclusion in the life of the family. If the baby is the center of the family, he sets the vector of its actions - this is not normal. Mom and dad, grandparents should not dance around the child. There is no doubt that you love your little one very much, but you should not give up household chores in order to assemble a sorter with him or lay out dominoes. For child development It will be much more useful if you wash the floor or hang out the laundry together, even if it makes the task much more difficult. But the baby will feel that you are one team engaged in a common cause!

2. Giving the child interesting toys, simultaneously explaining how to use them, “giving” ideas and showing attention to the child is a must! Leaving the baby to his own devices from morning to evening is, of course, wrong. And, of course, such “freedom” will not teach him independence, but will simply instill confidence in his own uselessness... However, the opposite model, when parents come up with games for the baby from morning to evening, is also abnormal. What kind of imagination and creativity can you expect from a child, for whom adults always come up with everything?

3. A game for a parent should not be a boring chore. It is better to play with your child less often, but only when you really want it. Don't like catch-up and hide-and-seek? Read a book to your child, put together a puzzle or mosaic, engage in joint creativity - such leisure time is no worse than playing games of strength. The main thing is your love and attention to children!

4. What older child, the less he needs the participation of an adult in his games. If a one and a half to two year old baby still needs his mother’s presence in the play area, support and advice, then a three to four year old dreamer can already make do with imaginary friends and communicate with toys, creating entire worlds.

5. If a child complains that he is bored and asks to play with him, most likely the problem is not a lack of ideas. He just needs this moment“feed” on the energy of your love. Give your son or daughter a little attention, talk, let him/her just sit on your lap, and you will see how quickly the child’s look will change - it will relieve boredom! Another great parenting option in case of childhood boredom is to invite your child to participate in your adult activity.

6. Do not solve the problem of “I don’t know how to play with a child” with the help of a TV and tablet, especially if your baby is not even three years old. Electronic gadgets deprive children of imagination, creativity and initiative.

Should you teach your child to play?

This question is again ambiguous. Children are naturally inclined to play - so why teach them to?

Teaching a very young child to manipulate objects, for example, a pyramid or a sorter, occurs naturally when parents communicate with the baby. Affectionate stroking with nursery rhymes, simple games like “peek-a-boo” or “horned goat”, singing songs - probably every mother does all this. The child feels love and attention, and he is happy thanks to all this simple actions. If you call them a game, then yes, you need to play with the little ones. And it’s not difficult at all, right?

A baby starting to crawl needs maximum freedom. Don't confine him to a playpen or crib, let him explore the space around him. This is the best game for him, plus, of course, he must be in close proximity to his mother. Crawling behind the mother, grabbing objects specially allocated for him (not necessarily toys, these can be pots, wooden spatulas or balls of thread), the baby receives a huge amount of new information. And, of course, mom should constantly talk to him, forming a passive vocabulary.

For children over a year old I already really want to participate in “social” life. They will be happy to help you wipe off the dust with a cloth and unload washing machine or wash the floor. It doesn’t matter that the result is still far from ideal – but what fun the baby gets! Walk as much as possible: physical development in children early age largely determines the mental. An active walk is good for the baby and removes the question from the agenda: what else can he do at home?

As for children over 2.5-3 years old, they already play, not just manipulating objects or imitating adults in their actions. A three-year-old begins to master the world of fantasy, and the less an adult interferes in this world, the better. The whole value and charm of the game at this age lies in inventing the plot yourself! If the game was invented and organized by the mother, the baby will be happy to join in what is happening, but will this be beneficial for him? creative development? Children quickly adapt to any external conditions. Therefore, they easily get used to receiving ready-made games from others and easily accept other people’s stereotyped ideas, forgetting to put forward their own. You can’t expect “creativity” from them later...

Dear moms and dads! Of course, you can and should play with your child. But what’s even more important is that this process brings joy to everyone. If you feel like a child at heart and truly enjoy the game, that's great! But the lack of enthusiasm for children's fun, especially for a mother who already has many responsibilities on her shoulders, is also quite normal. If only because we are adults, and play activity In principle, for us this stage has already been passed for a long time. There is no need to break yourself if the game is difficult; for the child, the most important thing is your love and care that you show, one way or another. Walking together, reading, creativity, and just doing housework are no less important for a child than the notorious games.

Everyone around is just shouting about the dangers of computer games. You see, they have a bad effect on the fragile consciousness of children and adolescents. There are a lot of horrifying examples of teenagers who played shooting games killing their classmates or family members. But stop, these are completely advanced cases. The key word in all these tragedies is “overplayed.” If you control the play time and do not let your child overplay, you can be sure that this will never happen to him. Moreover, games will help him become smarter, more collected, more self-confident and... Let's start in order.

Everything is good in moderation. This Golden Rule works with video games too. In reasonable doses, even an aggressive shooting game is beneficial. A reasonable dose is a maximum of 1.5 hours of play per day, ideally 40 minutes to an hour. Your main task is to monitor not what games your child chooses, but the time and not let him overplay. All numerous studies agree on one thing: playing up to 1.5 hours a day is beneficial, and more than 3 hours is definitely harmful. The plus turns into a minus the longer the child plays. This is very, very important, so under the description of each useful property video games, you will find a warning about what will happen if a child systematically overplays. If the regime is followed, computer games will be an excellent exercise for the brain and a stimulus for the development of important human qualities. So, let's go!

1. Video games are great multitasking training.

Today's popular video games are extremely detailed worlds. Every minute the player faces more and more new problems and tasks of completely different scales. The child has to do several things at once: determine a priority task, constantly switch between it and less significant problems of a local nature, when new ones arise, quickly assess the degree of their importance and how much time it will take to solve them and, of course, solve them. And all this, as a rule, must be done very, very quickly!

If you replay: It's simple - multitasking turns into absent-mindedness and an inability to structure activities.

2. Video games make kids more goal-oriented.

According to statistics, 80% of the time a gamer plays, he fails. Completing a quest, moving to the next level, obtaining an artifact, or defeating an enemy all account for only 20% of the time. It would seem that if there are so few joyful moments, why do children continue to play video games? The answer is simple - they have a goal. This is a goal imposed by the game that cannot be abandoned, because the only possible form of refusal is to stop playing. This forces players to be goal-oriented. Moreover, games teach children to be optimistic about their goals, believe in success and not give up. Gamers are always confident that victory is possible, and they need to get down to business quickly.

If you replay: virtual goals become more important for the child than real ones. Passivity develops as the player gets used to the fact that goals are always set by someone else.

3. Video games teach you how to communicate.

The most popular games- These are online games. In them, the child plays not alone, but with many gamers, and naturally communication occurs between them. The child constantly learns to establish relationships, avoid conflicts and cope with them. In 2009, one large-scale study found that children who play video games for about an hour a day are better socially adjusted than those who do not play at all. These children themselves noted that they were happy with everything and thought that they knew how to get along with their peers.

If you replay: According to the same study, those who played more than 3 hours a day showed exactly the opposite results and had problems in live communication with peers.

4. Video games improve concentration and attention.

You may think that gaming is a way to relax. The child comes after school and thus relaxes. Nothing of the kind, it just changes the type of load, because any game requires concentration and concentration from the gamer. It has been proven many times that people who play computer games remember information better and faster and concentrate better. A typical adult can concentrate on 3-4 objects at the same time, a gamer can concentrate on 6-7 objects. What does this mean in practice? For example, a lower likelihood of inattentional errors when solving school problems.

If you replay: The child's nerves are shaken, he is overtired and loses self-control. This is expressed in irritability, screaming, grimacing, restlessness, etc.

5. Video games breed experimenters.

Most popular computer games have no rules. There are goals and objectives, but it is not written anywhere how a child can fulfill them. This means that he has to comprehend everything through experience. This develops research abilities, the ability to compare one’s actions and their consequences and, based on this analysis, independently discover norms. This is exactly what school does not give children, where there are clear rules for all occasions.

If you replay: gaming standards are far from “normal”. Acting within the framework of the game for too long, the child begins to transfer game norms into life, and he develops misconceptions about reality.

6. Video games develop a sense of responsibility and teach trust.

Online games are full-fledged communities of interests. In essence, such a game consists of constant interaction between players. Over time, you will notice that your child has online friends, or rather an online team of like-minded people. And they, just like real friends, cannot be let down, otherwise it will be worse for you. The realization that everyone in the game depends on each other comes quickly. The child begins to learn to trust and rely on others, take responsibility and cope with what he takes on.

If you replay: The feeling of responsibility towards online friends takes on an unhealthy scale. The child is afraid to leave the game and thereby let his friends down or become unnecessary to them.

3014 2